So much for Independence!September 02, 2025

So much for Independence!

I never realized how independent I was until I was grounded from hip replacement surgery recently. I had planned ahead by lowering items in our suite so they would be reachable; by lining up projects that would be easy to accomplish without taking up too much space; by relocating the furniture in my bedroom for ease of access and by relocating all of my houseplants to one open shelf in front of our dining room window so that they would be easy to water. I even froze a variety of my favorite food for future meals. I then identified and made accessible the clothes that wash with little ironing including slacks that would be easy to wear for physical exercise workouts. I pulled a few books from my shelf for peaceful hours ahead. Finally, I gave our apartment a thorough cleaning. My Merici Crossing responsibilities were adopted by good friends: one Sister offered to cover my Friday time at the front desk, the sacristan agreed to hold the sacristy laundry for three weeks and I coached a close friend on watering all of the flowers which surround three of the shrines on the outside property. (I had hoped to weed the sunflower patch before my operation, but I ran out of time and energy, but still…..)

Prior to surgery, I was supported by a physical therapist who helped me strengthen my legs and coached me in doing the hospital prescribed exercises so that recovery would be easier. The day of surgery came; I was sent home the next day. That day was August 1, 2025. I was to learn just how independent I was not!

I depended on a team of Sisters who asked what I wanted for lunch or supper each day and who delivered it with cheer and encouragement. My spirit was lifted by the messages and prayers of friends and family. My out-of-town sister sent a beautiful bouquet of flowers. Within a few days my local family came to visit. And I had personal and professional support before, during and after my surgery because of the special care provided by our nurse, Mary.

As the days moved forward, I realized that my great plans did not guarantee the expected results. I had to find a tall friend to reach the orchids on the top shelf in order for them to be watered. My friend who was watering the outside plants needed a helper with better balance in order to manage the uneven sections of the rock garden. Watching the flowers grow from behind Merici Crossings’ windows is not as satisfying as “being there” but I must admit that it has been fun watching the sunflowers reach 12 feet and show their golden heads above the pergola. And I have been delighted to find the red sunflowers opening their blossoms as well.

All the projects that I organized so well remain in place, undone. The books that I set aside have not been read. My days are being defined by three daily routines of exercises and by follow–up periods of “icing” to support healing. Progress is slow, but sure. Healing goes forward at a snail’s pace no matter what we might plan. So much for independence!

Perhaps what I am learning is that a lifetime of being responsible for myself and for what I am doing, has more limitations than advantages. Perhaps I am having to realize that the best laid plans of anyone oft go awry. Perhaps I am growing in appreciation for the small and large acts of kindness that each person shares throughout very ordinary and routine days so that I will better imitate their example. Perhaps I am being taught a deserved lesson in humility. Perhaps I am appreciating the perseverance and patience of the lowly snail. Perhaps I am being reminded that all things are passing: God alone remains!

Next reflection will contain an update on my goal of having “a place for everything, and everything in its place.” Stay tuned!

Sister Anne Marie Diederich